so what's to criticize? let's see, well I'm blabbering. why am I blabbeing? well because my life is and must be devoted to the pieces of shit. I have been trying for years every god damned method of just making them go away. they don't. if I don't go to them, they come to me. that's the way it was, is, and forever shall be. so I should feel guilty for blabbering? I should not. or maybe I should feel guilty for justifying myself before the pieces of shit? well, that's the only thing I can think of blabbering about right now, and blabber I must, because my life is and must be devoted to the pieces of shit. I am now anticipating an harassment of some sorts, probably auditory. or they'll take advantage of me blabbering right now, and try to coerce me into blabbering more tomorrow. well, they'd be doing the same thing anyways, which is why I'm blabbering in the first place. this is indeed sad, but as I know from very long experience, my life is and must be devoted to the pieces of shit. there is no other way. as my every move must always be under a magnifying glass, next let us think how they will be trying to break my confidence. well, they can always just make faces. maybe really embarrassed faces, like: well, you really stepped out of line this time, you have made a complete fool out of yourself. you were overly forthcoming and just went on and on with all these things we just did not need to hear. I shall reply: my life is and must be devoted to the pieces of shit, there is no other way. or what did they do last year? well, they called me an actor. this does not make sense, since they are actors, and I am not. actually, it does make sense: they are actors... anyways, I don't act, I mean what I say, sometimes my mood changes, like I might be in a bad mood, then in a better mood later, that could happen. they however are exactly that. their very appearance is an act, and when they pretend to have emotions, well that's the feature presentation. so why am I writing for nobody? well, because I am here, and there is nobody, and as long as they keep sucking my blood, I will be writing, and for lack of options, I am writing for nobody.